Tears shed on a funeral.

Gone too soon.

Today, I attended a friend's funeral. We are really not that close but I always see her since we were kids. Her uncle is a close friend of my dad and mingling with their huge family wasn't hard. They are very dear to us and I could say we treat them as our family too.

She's dear to her cousins and relatives. She's known for being 'bungis-ngisera, walang kaarte-arte, at mapagkumbaba'. She throws funny jokes, and smiles a lot. To her mom, she's a precious gift and to her siblings she's a very loving sister.

I never thought I'd be affected this much but I say to myself that the sadness that transpired in the funeral served a good force for me to write this down.

Ate Meng, 24, a mother of two sweet angels and a good wife of Kuya Charles, died because of Dengue. The relatives told us she had Grade 4 Dengue. She stayed in the hospital and fought for her life in the ICU... but eventually surrendered and lifted everything to God.

Her mom, Tita Joy, suffered so much pain. In pain to see her daughter being CPR-d (i don't know how the experts call the past tense of CPR but yeah, she was) and finally having to decide to cut it out or continue. Ate Meng fought, she had her own battle but things were too fast.

I don't personally know her husband Charles but I saw them couple of times. Quiet couple but always sweet and thoughtful of each other. They had kids at a very young age, two sweet angels Charline (6y/o) and Catherine (turning 1 this Dec25). When I saw Charles the other night at the wake, he looked sad and exhausted. I often find him staring blankly at something. And I told myself, what if I am living the life and carrying the sadness he has right now?

Things start to flash in my head, countless sad, drifting things I could think of and a tear fell down from my eye. I said to myself, I am never strong with this kind of thing. Losing a loved one is hard. We thought break-ups are hard but this one is harder. When breaking up, you have this hope that you'll see him/her again, or someday you'll be back in each others' arms.. but with death, I can't explain it, but it's heartbreaking... and you have nothing.

When we attended the final mass, the priest kept on saying things that have something to do with Christmas. But what's moving is the part where Tita Joy spoke in front of everybody for her message and simple memories of Ate Meng.

Half a second, she's sobbing in front of everybody. She said, "...Sanay ako nagpapatawa, hindi sa ganito." It's true. She's a happy person and it's hard to see a mother who lost her daughter at a very young age. She had these messages from her children from the States. The messages made us cry. Charles did. Lots of times.

Charline did too eventually. I saw in her eyes that she's trying to understand everything, all the sobbing from the people in the room. Her aunts told her, "Wala na si Mommy mo, nasa heaven na.." and Charline just cried her heart out while hugging her Daddy Charles. It was really a heartbreaking thing to see.

The final blessing was another sad thing to see. Everybody was crying but what really caught my attention was Tita Joy. She kept on saying, "I love you anak, I love you so much. I love you Charmaine!" She said that many times with tears on her eyes.

I never thought I'd cry that much. I felt the love and sadness, the urge, the wish "IF ONLY WE COULD TURN BACK TIME.", the regret "IT HAPPENED TOO FAST." and the most moving words "WE WILL MISS HER."

It was hard for Tita Joy to accept that her daughter's gone now but I know Charles and her share the same pain. Charles loved her so much and he probably worries the future... I was told that Ate Meng usually waits for Charles at the doorstep of their house every night at sabay sila mag-didinner. She serves him and she's a very good wife to Charles. Paano na ngayon? When Charles gets home, who would wait for him at the doorstep? Who would hug him so tight? Comfort him? Who would help him with raising up the kids? These are probably the things Charles would surely miss about Ate Meng...

When the cremation was over, I found Charles staring blankly at the legit papers he has on his hands and he stared at Ate Meng's urn. I saw the sadness. I saw the pain.

I am sure the wounds would heal and they all would move on...

This experience thought me so many things. We could be gone in a blink of an eye and it would also be too late for us to thank all the people who loved us so much, that's why we must cherish everything before it's too late.

Ate Meng, you will be surely missed! Rest in peace.



PS.

..so when I die, I want everybody to wear white. I want a wide photo gallery near my coffin or chapel. I want an AVP and a mini movie where of course, ako ang bida. I want dim lights and the mini movie just keeps on playing. I don't think I want to be cremated but I'd surely love to get a regular visit from my loved ones. I want singing sessions at the wee hours para naman lively. I don't know but if you guys see this blog when I'm dead, please do these things for me.. kundi mumultohin ko kayo!

12 noon thoughts.

I'm waiting for the clock to tick at 12noon. LUNCH BREAK!

I am currently craving for food (as always). It's Thursday today and articles about FOOD have just spread the sheets of Philippine newspapers. And honestly speaking, they are also one of the factors of my cravings.

I would like to eat a slice of pizza.

Meat lovers pizza from Pizza Hut!

Are you familiar with the double delight promo you could get in Pizza Hut food stalls? I always look for that whenever I am on-the-go but starving. I usually eat it on the road, just to put something in my belly. I don't go for the Hawaiian pizza. I find it weird to have a pineapple on cheese, tomato sauce, and meat. Hahaha! MAHILIG AKO SA MAALAT, sorry!

I also want a Ziti to pair up with my pizza.

Ziti meatball from Aveneto

Pasta! Oh my! This one is so good for my tummy. Haha! I love eating pasta with lots of cheese and tomato sauce! Plus, of course, let's not forget the GARLIC BREADS! Random fact, I pair the garlic bread of Banapple with catsup! I find it yummy and it even tastes like pizza. Go try it some time! I am not kidding! Hehe!

I also want to have a Salisbury Steak

Red Ribbon's Salisbury Steak!

This one is really a must-eat! Its juicy burger patty is so yummy! The buttered corn and carrots also! And hmmmmm I won't forget the Mashed Potato with gravy! Haaay nakakagutom!!

For dessert, I think I would love a Banoffee Pie.

Banoffee Pie from Banapple!

This slice of cake is so yummy and it is worth the wait. Stuffed with bananas and cream, it could surely make your taste buds crave for more! It's cheap also! Big serving too!

And if I'll eat dinner, I would surely have a Chicken Breast Parmigiano.

Chicken Breast Parmigiano from Banapple

Yes, I am such a Banapple fan! Hahaha! But this one tastes so good that I always recommend it to people. Chicken fillets topped with tomato sauce and melted cheese! I tried cooking like these at home! So convenient and my mom loved it! It's so yummmmmmmmy!

I wish I'm an expert in cooking! I wish I could cook some like these in the future! I love to eat kasi hahaha so I should know how to cook! Plus, Axle loves food too! Don't ya worry, I will cook these! Hahaha!

It's 12noon! Time to hit the pantry!

Eat moderately,
Jonah.

Jonah: Sa Pelikulang Pinoy

So I was reading the newspaper today and I have met the column about the 7 Cinema One Originals that will be shown in Shangri-la Theaters on November 10-16. I am so excited for it!

And then I came across with this article (of which I cannot remember the title anymore) that states that the rate of Filipinos "na nanonood sa mga sinehan" increased by 23%. First thing that entered my mind is the possible influence and amusement brought by 3D.

I have watched movies in 3D. My first encounter with 3D cinema was when we watched Toy Story 3. The experience was outstanding! Sure I can enjoy the movie either way but watching it in 3D format's way better (and expensive? haha) but the experience was worth it!

Another encounter I had was when we watched Streetdance 3D. It's a dance movie that I enjoyed as well. Another one is Step-Up 3D. These movies really made me happy (and extra intergalactic happy because it's in 3D! haha!).

I suppose the thrill that 3D movies give its audience must have influenced and persuaded more people to watch films in movie houses and not on their couches. Meaning, people found a concrete and valid reason to watch in cinemas and not buy pirated dvds on the streets of Quiapo. Watching films in cinemas may be quite expensive. Movies in 3D formats are twice the price of regular screenings, but the popcorn tumbler, soft drinks, and the experience compensate everything!

Sure, pirated dvds are cheaper and more convenient to use. There are so many perks: You can avail 4-5 dvds in just 100 bucks. You can watch it on a daily basis, whenever and wherever you like. Another thing that may be listed as a 'pro' is that it saves your pockets.

I am no-advocate of original dvds nor of pirated dvds. In my own opinion, I think it's okay if you purchase pirated dvds as long as it is NOT A FILIPINO-MADE MOVIE. Our nationalism should come into play in situations like these. SUPORTAHAN ANG SINING AT ANG PELIKULANG PINOY!

I am a film-lover and a movie-goer. (Dating Movie-Goer, ngayon Filmmaker, Mowelfund 2009) It is only normal for us to search for some movies that serve as a textbook for our craft and it is also normal that we cannot find all these in the usual and common video rentals or video houses. We, in some way or another, purchase pirated DVDs. (Please do not be a hypocrite!) Another refuge we could turn to is the Torrents. Downloading must be the last resort because it is time-consuming and megabytes-related.. even gigabytes! Hahaha!

People who are reading this: Philippine Cinema died along with Fernando Poe Jr. and Rudy Fernandez who, legendarily, made tons of movies in a year. Filipinos always trusted their craft, their way of revealing different characters on screen and I bet it would not hurt that much if we create another legendary figures in Philippine Cinema. We have to REVIVE it. We NEED to.

Let us all support people who make movies especially PINOYS who take all kinds of pains and excrete gallons of sweat para lang mapaganda at MAIPAGMALAKI ang pagiging PINOY. If you have time, make an effort to support them. This coming November, let us make time to visit Shangri-la's cinemas and see the different emerging breeds of Cinema One Originals.

Kita kits!
-Jonah

The work and all that jam.

This should be called the WORKING GIRL's column. LOL!

So I'm blogging about my current work situation. I am the new Media Relations Officer, yo! Haha! My job description is to dispatch and monitor Press Releases of our clients. We do the 'charm' of Red Ribbon, Delifrance, Bistro Ravioli, Unilever, Shell Philippines- to name a few.

At first it was hard because I have to read different newspapers and magazines EVERYDAY to see if our press releases were already published! And I am glad to say that I am getting the hang of it. It's a nice experience because I am usually fascinated with reading through the internet and not the sheets, but now it's different because I do both! Haha!

Another fascinating thing I do here is the regular 'rubbing elbows' with different editors from different publications. Those who write for Lifestyle section, Entertainment, Business, and the like! It's like I do meet-ups and charm those big names we see on the paper everyday!

Well, some editors are busy so they just ask the guard to receive Press Releases for them. Some are extremely cheerful and warm when they know someone from a PR company visits them. We usually exchange smiles, comments, and simple kamustahan.

I admire their writing, especially those in the Lifestyle section. Their writing inspires me so much and knowing that I could visit them anytime gives me more confidence that someday, I could consult them when I write my own creative stuffs.

Having a work like this taught me how to be independent and ma-PR (malamang!). I am usually the reserved type of person and I don't talk that much unless we're in the I-know-you-and-you-know-me stage. It also taught me how to arrange my thoughts whenever I talk on the phone and interact with people in the business. It made me smile 90% more and talk endlessly about random stuffs!

Enjoying the work and having a good salary is a good equation. Of course, I cannot wait for the 15's and 30's of every month! having your own hard-earned money gives you the joy of being independent and responsible child of your beloved parents. NAAAX! hahaha!

Till here,
Jonah.

The times that tried our souls.

Did you ever have that movie that made you sit still? Well, I just did.

"When the action is over and we look back, we understand both more and less. The times that tried our souls." -Evelyn

These lines definitely got me the act to write my thoughts down. I never thought I would be moved this much.

It was one of the boring nights at home. And just because I am a movie freak, I saw this beautiful movie made by Michael Bay. The only war picture I loved (and adored) was HURT LOCKER by Kathryn Bigelow.. not until today. I have discovered one of the Hollywood's treasures and that is PEARL HARBOR (2001).

I know I'm a little late to see this movie but it really was one of the most amazing movies I have ever seen! I learned so much about it and I believe I was moved and I was inspired.

I learned so much about America's history and how December 7 of 1941 brought the Great America to tears, defeat and the need to surge forward to seek Victory. America's history is rich with valor and enthusiasm. I should not be surprised because for all we know, IT IS THE LAND OF THE FREE, THE HOME OF THE BRAVE.

In this movie, I have learned so much about brotherhood and valor. The two courageous young (and extremely charming) pilots had sacrifice so much of their lives to their beloved country and countrymen. Just like any other person, Rafe and Danny went through all the hardships an Army Air Corps' pilots would have but their bond went beyond the oath... they treated each other like brothers- from the beginning up to the end.

Another thing that's amazing in this movie is that it was able to incorporate romance into action and suspense. I have seen lots of TV series and movies that could mix them all up- Dear John, Prison Break.. to mention a few. But this movie has given me a different perspective, a different twist to experience. Who would ever wonder that two different men who treated each other like brothers could love the same girl? At the same time and the same place..

RAFE and EV.

Their love was extraordinary. Rafe found love in the middle of the hospital filled with aspiring heroes-to-be. It started out with a simple conversation and they both fell for each other. Ev is a very charming nurse (Kate Beckinsale literally has the looks!) and Rafe is a hot pilot (Ben Affleck's eyes could say much!).. together, they are like winners to genetic lottery or in other words, CHEMISTRY (hahaha!). But who would ever thought that Rafe would be one of those missing men in the middle of the battle and Ev was left alone, crying her heart out? See, that's what I am talking about. This movie has lots of surprises!

and that's where the story about DANNY and EV started...

Danny is the bestfriend of Rafe and it pained him also to know that he lost his bestfriend in the battle. Danny saved Ev's drowning and breaking heart. He made him believe that just because someone dear to her passed away, her heart should not be filled with sadness because good things shall come her way. And it did.. they both fell in love during the process of letting go with the past. It was cloud nine for them not until Rafe, still alive, showed up.

Rafe and Danny's friendship was put to test. If I were to be asked, this part of the movie was unexpected. I did not see it coming, not even a bit. And so, it made me love the plot even more!

I would love to share few lines I remember from the movie.

If I had one more night to live... I'd wanna spend it with you.- Evelyn

Having the thought of living your life all over again- from the beginning up to the end- with the same person? At some point, I did. It was when I fell in love and literally did not think of anyone else but him. I could not even imagine myself having a relationship with someone else.. even to the hottest crush I have on the list! I guess it is because you are satisfied and happy with that person that nothing else and no one else can compare with.

Ma'am, please, don't take my wings.-Rafe

It sounds unusual but these lines moved my heart. It was when Rafe was having that slim chance of being a pilot in the Army. When he uttered those words, it brought me to realization that WE SHOULDN'T LET SOMEONE, OR SOMETHING TAKE AWAY OUR ASPIRATIONS. We should not give up, nor give in. If he wanted to do more than the flying, then Rafe must have his 'wings' and I'm glad Ev did not take it away from him.

...all I ever wanted was for us to have a home and grow old together, but life never asked me what I wanted.-Evelyn

This is all true. When life gives you lemon, you're supposed to make a lemonade right? But what if you DEMAND tequila and salt instead? Life is unexpected and life can get freaky sometimes. All we gotta do is hold on and learn each step we go through.

Now I'm going to give Danny my whole heart... but I don't think I'll ever look at another sunset without thinking of you... I'll love you my whole life.-Evelyn

This line brought me to tears actually. I do not know why. I haven't experienced it but I saw the sincerity and the hurt between them. It was true love for them but because of some inevitable circumstances, they had to give up their faith that one day they will be reunited and fall in love again. It hurts so much for Rafe because the thought of Evelyn waiting for her kept him alive in the battle and it brought him home but it was too late for the both of them. Evelyn had let go of the past and believed that Rafe is dead and so she had to move on. If only time stood still and Rafe did not go to Britain... if only.

And so, to end this writing, I have to impart to you some words to ponder on...

When the action is over and we look back, we understand both more and less.

Contemplations.

I write when I'm happy, I write when I'm sad. But today, I'm writing for a new reason: REALIZATIONS.

It is true that when you're quiet, you come into a haven of different realizations. Some are evil, some are good.. or sometimes, some are dirty. Hahaha! (I know you guys get a good laugh on this one!) But after those realizations and contemplations, you somehow get lost or get in the right track. Well, today, I am lucky because through 'these' relaizations, I was moved to be a better person.

Number 1, opportunities come and go but what counts the most is that you grab it when you want it (and it's for the common good) or let it pass you by if you're not really into it. Two simple things to do. ACCEPT and REJECT. No complexities.

Number 2, your partner cannot be with you all the time and you have to accept the things that he can do without you. You were born on different time, different places, different days...It wouldn't hurt that much if you do things differently. What's important is that you grow together and you, two, do not grow apart.

Number 3, learn not to sweat the small stuff. Small stuffs have the tendencies to grow big, if and only if you will let them. When it did not hurt your feelings, let it go.

Number 4, if you hate a person, never let him/her get into your system. The more you hate him/her, the more you make him/her powerful. So if your hatred hits 101%, let it go. Be kind to animals, remember? LOL!

Number 5, prayers are powerful. I learned today, from a random status in Facebook, that when praying, we must not beg.. we must BELIEVE. And that alone will make our prayer powerful.

And last but not the least, my passion is on fire. I believe that MAKING MOVIES do have a calling. If people do believe in your capability and creativity, it convinces you (so much) to push through with the project. I have realized that making my very own movie is a blessing. SOON. :)

So there.

I BELIEVE that my name will soon appear on the big silverscreen while you guys are eating popcorn of taking a sip of your favorite drink. Who knows, with 3D glasses too?

Always a believer,

JONAH :)

I love you.

There are things that can be changed if only we will bother to ask.

Today is the 883rd day of one of the most-valued relationships I have. It never stopped, and I hope it would never end. We must all believe in second chances. If we sucked at the first try then, we must not lose hope to try again. If and only if you know that it's all you've ever wanted..

We did some things for the sake of finding ourselves. You chose to love yourself more, to explore things you wanted to try, make friends with time.. Never ever regret it because you did yourself a huge favor.. and that is to change.

I am happy right now because I know I made the right decision. This is all I have ever wanted. I held on to it for so long. Just like a kite, flying wild in the vastness of sky.. He pulled it and now it has found its way back. I will hold it again, and together, just you and me.. we'll make it fly.. higher than before.

I am lost for words, but I love you.. each and every day.

One More Chance does happen, if only we try. :)